An urge sweeps over me
one I've grown accustomed to
yet have been able to quiet from time to time
There have been times when its overpowered me
and times that followed with regret
I marvel at its strength now
it comes at the darkest, lowest moments
knowing my weaknesses
and feeding off them
Go on, dig in! it cries with sinister screams
Paint a picture, make it red
with darker hues of crimson and scarlet
You found me here,
now take me up in to your arms
and I will set you free!
Too true do I know of the release you bring
it last but a fleeting moment and then is gone
leaving me worse off than before
You'd think I'd be stronger
now that I know
that I would ignore your deceptive attraction
The balances are wavering
indecision rests in my hands
the battle of the mind grows tense
There is nothing to gain if you win
only long term pain, nothing short term in the contract
After the paint dries, the canvas remains marred
giving me a daily reminder of your demonic handiwork
Pain, pain go away!
I know you'll come back another day
I bid you, leave me now
take your tools of torture with you
you've done your job
be satisfied with the price I paid
December 23, 2006
To mark a battle won
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